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The Naples Archaeological Musuem and Its Penis Room

When the situation calls for it, I am a mature person. I can talk comfortably about reproductive health, I can watch a movie with a sex scene and not make a joke, and I can look at nude statues and think nothing of it beyond art. Hell, my senior yearbook quote was about how maturity is just knowing when and where to be immature. I won't laugh when you fall down because you might be hurt and I absolutely do not laugh when an animal humps something because it's instinct and the animal can't help it. I believe you shouldn't laugh at something if the thing you're laughing at is helpless in the situation. But sometimes you find your limit. The National Archaeological Museum of Naples (abbreviated MANN in Italian) pushed me near my limit. See, Naples is home to brilliant and interesting historical artwork. With the nearby town of Pompeii buried under the ash of Mt. Vesuvius, tons of pristine artifacts which were rescued from Pompeii ended up in MANN. Some of these p...
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Movie

Someone asked me today: if my life were made into a movie, would I watch it? HELL YES, I WOULD. Upon answering so emphatically, she called me out for being cocky. Here is my extended answer, including teasers, cliff-hangers, and the possible title. I justify my arrogance by saying that if I don't believe in my product, who in the world is going to see it? The movie about me would be executive produced by me, obviously. I have the final say in what goes and what doesn't. If my life were made into a movie, only the most important parts would make it...it would be like a 23 year highlight reel crammed into 2 hours and 12 minutes (any longer and I'm risking a major walk-out-to-pee-and-miss-the-important-stuff crowd reaction). For the meaty part, think about all the great things this movie would have! It would feature sports, love, friendships, hardships, heartbreaks, family bonds, and most importantly...frontal male nudity. Name one thing from that list that doesn't appear ...
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Lake Como

No. I did not see George Clooney, nor do I know where his house is. That's the first (and usually only) question that gets asked by Americans about Lake Como. The reason he "lives" there though is that it's insanely beautiful and simultaneously close to and far from the rest of the world. It's a 40 minute train from Milan for about 3 euros per person, and once you get there you'll see towns that seem to be only reachable by boat while others are just one more stop along the train route. So what I'm saying is that it's really nice. On an unseasonably warm January day, the two of us headed out to see what all the fuss was over, although I'd gone with Graham in 2012 and knew it was gorgeous. We arrived about 10:00 a.m. and began by stomping through the town of Como, which is pretty nice. It has a major medieval feel, with an old city-wall popping up in a few places and a couple of giant cathedrals. The main one, the Duomo (aka the Como Duomo, to p...
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