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Holy Crap

For realzies, guys. We just had our Improv level D show tonight...and it was friggin fantastic.

Sure, there was a little mishap with the timing and we didn't get our allotted 25 minutes and they actually just cut the lights before we were done, but it was still awesome.

I've got great news that sprung from this: My suspicions were true...this is my drug.

After our level C show a couple of months ago, I didn't feel good about myself. The show went fine but I didn't like how I performed...I didn't feel like I was focusing on the right aspects of the scenes - I wasn't creating anything interesting, I was just kinda sitting back and letting it happen around me. I was passive, and it felt stupid.

But tonight, getting off stage after that show...it was totally different. I felt like I performed well and was completely in tune with my scene partners and wasn't worried about what was going on in the crowd. It just felt amazing. I was on a huge emotional high for a few hours after the show...it was beautiful.

I feel this amazing hybrid between liberated and exhilarated. That feeling was everything I was hoping it could and would be. Feeling so good after the show was the best inclination I've gotten thus far that this really is going to be as fulfilling a process as I've been hoping it would be.

If that doesn't make sense to you, my biggest fear in life is that my dreams will come true and I still won't feel anything. This was a huge step in conquering that fear. It solidified the desires and has lent credence to the theory that it will feel as good as I hope it will. Perhaps it will be in increments - only feeling good after each time I get to go do something that makes people laugh. But even if that's the case, that'll just make me do it more often.


Oh, and start a USA chant. I love you, America.

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